What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

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TEXT:

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

What's your take on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? How has it affected you?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What is your juiciest sex story?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Do you agree with Michael Moore that Donald Trump is "toast" in a political comeback?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Are there any Hollywood celebrities who never divorced? Why does it seem like celebrities are likely to get divorced frequently?

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

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Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

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Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Make Nazis afraid again!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Have you ever had a weird experience immediately following the death of a loved one that made you think there is an afterlife and that the deceased person was communicating with you?

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

How can we become the best humans? How can we trust each other?

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

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Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

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After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.